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wonders never cease Thursday, April 28, 2011

WEDNESDAY, April 27th, 2011 Hawaiian after all, you say?

long_birth-certificate We apologize for the play list hiatus but we've been too busy trying to solve a great mystery to trouble ourselves with creating play lists celebrating seasons, or anniversaries, or even the birthdays of famous people. It has been a particular birthday of a particular famous person that has kept us so focused and preoccupied. You see, we have been trekking around the world with our tongues planted firmly in our cheeks, diligently trying to get to the bottom of the mystery of the birthplace of our forty fourth president. Our blog is mighty and powerful, but it does not afford us the gravitas and bully pulpit that accompanies being a Reality TV Star/Potential Presidential Candidate. We were forced to get answers to our ridiculous questions the old fashioned way - by ignoring all answers that aren't the ones we want to hear and trying to refute them at all costs. Our fingers are weary from flipping through card catalogs and dusty birth records from Jamaica to Jakarta, Kenya to Katmandu. Needless to say, we found nothing. Until today, we weren't even sure that President Obama had been born at all. Thank goodness our national nightmare has come to an end. Thanks to the incessant hectoring from the nattering nabobs on the fringes of what passes for modern day punditry, we now have proof that Barak Hussein Obama was indeed born, possibly even in America if you consider Hawaii to genuinely be part of America. We know some Hawaiians who would argue otherwise, so perhaps they can get together with disappointed birthers and come up with a new strategy to discredit the legitimacy of our Commander In Chief. We intend to put the matter to rest, and to get back to the business of assembling collections of thematically related songs for your listening pleasure. We would like to thank the State of Hawaii (or Kingdom if you fall on that side) for putting an end to our misery and finally providing the completely unnecessary documents that will surely fail to satisfy the die-hard critics. Here is the music:

1. Born In The USA - Bruce Springsteen
Announcing the campaign song for Obama's 2012 reelection.

2. Hawaiian Superman - Israel Kamakawiwoole
Or maybe he should go with this one just to rub the birthers' noses in it. If we were running his campaign, we would have egged the birthers on and then released the long form certificate as an October surprise.

3. Title and Registration - Death Cab for Cutie
We've seen the short form, we've seen the long form. There has to be another document that we can demand, right? Is it really over?

4. Good Morning Baby - Bic Runga
Bic Runga welcomes a new world without birthers clamoring for election nullification. Good luck with that.

5. Born into Giving It Up - Richard Buckner
Maybe this song isn't exactly on point but we love Buckner and so we dissected the title to fit our needs.

6. I'm a Believer - The Monkees
We're willing to capitulate that Obama was born in Hawaii, but now we want to see Hawaii's birth certificate.

7. Stupidity Tries - Elliott Smith
Eliot Smith explains the "Trump as Republican Party Frontrunner" phenomenon.

8. Little Lies - Fleetwood Mac
This one goes out to all the carnival barkers that whip the masses into their frothy frenzy.

9. One Way or Another - Debbie Harry on The Muppet Show
Unsatisfied birthers can use this song to stoke their fires or wind their cuckoo clocks.

10. For What's it's Worth - The Muppet Show
And, as is our way, we close with muppets pondering "There's something happening here. What it is ain't exactly clear... Stop! Hey, what's that sound? Everybody look what's goin' down."

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